I’ve been waiting to make this “announcement” ( I don’t feel like my moving is news enough to make it worthy of a real announcement) for a little while. It’s taken a little while to really get a good grasp on how I feel about this new direction.
Ever since June and the HUGE-CHANGE-THE-WAY-I-THINK-ABOUT-ALL-OF-MY-PLANS-FOR-MY-LIFE experience that was the Exodus Freedom Conference, I’ve known that things would have to be different… which was challenging. Colliding with the Exodus experience was a new role I’d recently taken on at work, the role I had moved to Dallas to earn, and I wasn’t quite sure that this new passion that was beginning to burn inside of me was reason enough to completely change paths.
God, however, was sure… and He’s used every day since the conference to make it abundantly clear that my job and His plan were incompatible with each other.
It’s been a painful time for me, I’m not going to lie, even though I know the new direction my life is taking is right, the process of becoming sure has been painful. It’s funny, we ask God for clarity, for wisdom, for direction, for signs… even for proof sometimes, but I’m not sure we know what we’re asking for. Had I known, for instance, that clarity would come with heartache, that wisdom would be developed through facing injustice and having my character questioned, or that direction would be given in the midst of my weeping in humiliation, I might not have asked for them. =)
The good news is that today I know things about myself, and God, that I didn’t know the day I kissed my Mom goodbye and moved to Dallas. And I think learning these things the way I’ve had to learn them has been necessary to becoming the person God created me to be.
I am thankful.
Not only for the opportunity to come to know God in the way that being here “on my own” has given me, but for the friendships that I’ve developed while I’ve been here. For the people who’ve been faithful in helping me feel supported and less alone. There aren’t words for what they mean to me.
So there you have it.